Forget

Have you ever just wanted to forget something? Forget how you feel, forget what you've seen. Forget what someone said to you. Many have agreed that to completely forget something or someone is too big of a "cheat" to wish for. Others, who would have you believe that they are much stronger than they actually are would say that things "worthy of forgetting" are meant to happen and are meant to make you stronger because of it....you tell that to kid who stays up at night because he can't make his mind stop running, and tells his friends its insomniac so he can seem as normal as possible. If that's the "normality" he seeks, imagine then if you will how unmoral he truly feels

What if, you truly just wanted to forget how you felt?

Not hide it, or ignore it but sincerely -- forget.

Like a lost set of keys, with which, when lost, you know they are somewhere but you do not know where...First, a tensing and dark feeling of concerns creeps in, blotting out even the finest of sun rays and rose smells. You feel an overwhelming sensation of need. Thinking you need them more now so then ever before. Then you begin to realize that you might have a spare... and that the primary one which you have lost are not as important as they first seemed, or rather--- as you first made them seem...Then you finally come to the realization that you can barely remember what the keys looked like. Something that you gave the power to take up your valuable time and your important emotions---then seems absolutely irrelevant.

God, how I wish I could forget.... Like a set of keys, the same process the same steps but in a matter of seconds. I would gladly take this feeling and toss them aside. I'd forget them in the cracks of a sofa, or leave them at some distant location I'll never visit.... I'd walk away from them and leave them to starve out, wither away, and die. I'd forget the memory of them. The seconds it would take, they wouldn't even be difficult, id enjoy the process and welcome it as I would some distant relative. Someone I have not seen, I do not know, but need in my life.

I feel it has become necessary. I feel I am strong enough in all aspects of my life but not that of which the ones I need to be. Maybe those are the ones that I feel I need to forget........I guess it doesn't matter anymore. I don't want it to be a choice. By reciprocation and balanced fairness I should not be able to choose. Like the unplanned "forgetting" of something. I too should be able to find myself tomorrow, after a full night's sleep, awake and free of this weight that hangs on me..........Such is my life, hoping for the unlikely, having faith that the improbable could happen in a matter of seconds.........

Maybe it's not a selfish thing.

Maybe I want to forget you so that I can also... forgive you.

As I don't deserve the first part of that statement....You do not deserve the second.